It’s that time of the year again when us dads get a small gift from their children for them basically ruining all the fun we used to have, taking all our once free time and spending all our money on Lol dolls, footballs, video games and other shite.
I’m not at all bitter.
Anyway, there are always some bargain to have as the supermarkets make the most out of yet another cash grab so here’s my guide to buying your dad the perfect whisky.
I’ll be looking mainly at Tesco and Asda because most people have one to hand.
I’ll break this down into several categories depending on how much you actually value all the time and money your father has hemorrhaged on horse riding lessons, ballet classes and using up annual leave to attend sports days (Sports days in which winning isn’t even particularly encouraged now, it’s all about just taking part, so I’m told as I force my daughter out on another 10k run).
Option 1 (I don’t give a fuck about the old bastard, sitting there on his fat arse watching the horse racing and drinking cheap lager, what’s he ever done for me?)
You can get a litre of Grouse for £16 in Asda, that’ll do the lazy bastard and if you really hate him the Dalwhinnie Winter’s Gold is “reduced” to £26 in Tesco, then you can show him you’ve spent decent coin whilst taking zero interest on what you’re buying.
Option 2 (He’s okay, he turns up sometimes to school events, sometimes reads to me and my birthday present wasn’t broken this year)
I’d suggest Monkey Shoulder which is £22 in Tesco just now and if he’s not a Malt snob then it’s a cracking bottle of whisky, Glenfiddich 12 Year Old and Glenmorangie 10 are both a tenner off in Tesco too, so worth a shout, Highland Park 12 Year Old is also on offer if he prefer the smoky stuff.
Option 3 (He spends at least half of his free time just asking what we can do together, he’s hardly ever buying himself new stuff just so I can attend ballet and gymnastics)
We’re getting to the really good stuff here, a decent father gift, maybe push the boat out and pick him up a bottle of the Glenfiddich 15 Year Old which is a great price in Tesco just now at £30 or the awesome Eagle Rare 10 Year Old from Asda, well, it’s from Kentucky, but Asda sell it, and it’s one of my all time favourite drams, if your dad likes Bourbon it’s right up with the best and only £36.
Option 4 (He always turns up, he’s saved up for your wedding, picked you up all time, it’s time to treat the old man to something special).
Glenfiddich 18 is under £70 at Tesco but now I think we’ll open the door to Sainsbury’s too where the fantastic Balvenie 17 Year Old is £72 or maybe even find a Waitrose and pay just £55 for a Mitcher’s small batch Bourbon.
So there you go, whether you think he’s a pain in the arse who never lifts a finger of if he’s almost as perfect as me I’ve given you something to get him.