And now for something completely different.

I’m not sure if you’ve read anything about #bloggerblackmail, if you’ve not you can look it up but I’ll give you the abridged version.

To cut a long story short a blogger went a shop to try their cakes and stuff and didn’t get what she felt she “deserved” and so she gave a bitchy review before the shop owner on her own blog hit back, the original blogger returned serve and then it sort of went viral. I have nothing but sympathy for the shop in question, the blogger expected around £100 of free stuff, yes you read that right, for her to give a complimentary review, what a self entitled arsehole, it’s what’s wrong with blogging, if you get something for nothing there is a sort of obligation to be nice about the product and then popular bloggers actually think they can dictate to business owners what they should receive, the blogger in question is far from the only bully in the blogging world but she’s right up near the top when it comes to delusions of grandeur.
One the things the original blogger moaned about was that blogging takes up her time and so she should be paid for it, fuck off, this blog has taken me about two hours if you include setting up the pictures and trying to get my daughter to play ball and then do this write up and I paid for the sweets.
I have been lucky enough to receive the odd sample and bottle but the majority of what I tweet about or review I buy myself as I have with the selection of marshmallows and teacakes I’m about to review.
If you blog, do it because you want too not because you think you’re owed something or to make money out of it.
So now that’s out of the way let’s begin.
And here were are Ladies and Gentlemen with a review miles away from whisky, after the whole blogger blackmail thing I decided to buy some marshmallows and teacakes for my daughter and myself to enjoy with some special guests.
So we begin with Two large square marshmallows, a macaron and two Muffles, yeah Muffles, I didn’t know such a thing existed either but everyday is a school day.
We’re joined by Mickey and Minnie Mouse who appear to have just wed as well as Winnie the Pooh, Ellie the Elephant from the Haven holiday sites and some wee dog thing, tea is served and the sweetie scoffing begins.
“Fuck me pink” these are awesome mumbles Micky Mouse after stuffing half a Muffle in his mouth, not words you’d expect from a kids entertainer but these are nice, the only way I can describe these delights are have you eaten marshmallows made by God? No, well try these and I’m guessing you’re nearly there.
The marshmallows are much firmer than you’d get from the sort you’d get from a supermarket and are very strong in flavour, the following picture illustrates what I mean.
Or maybe this one
Anyway, the Lemon Curd number, I think it was Lemon Curd, was a genuinely beautiful thing, I know I can be a bit harsh at times and I also know I’m known for being blunt but this marshmallow melted my heart, it looked lovely, it had a lovely smell, all lemon curd and that, and tasted amazing, I really liked the firm and super sticky texture of the marshmallow.
The Macaron was eaten before I had a chance to even sniff the fucking thing but I ate the raspberry one last night, HA HA, and after years of eating posh supermarket offerings finally I have tasted the sort of thing I hear people harping on about when they talk about the complex awesomeness of a Macaron, it was superb, crispy on the outside soft on the inside with a proper burst of fruit flavour and without the clawing sweetness these thing can sometimes, and by sometimes I mean almost always, deliver.
So we went from a full plate of delights to
in about ten minutes but that wee bastard dog pinched half of them, he won’t be getting invited back, in fact he’ll be getting put down.
So there we have it, yeah they’re expensive and if I’m honest too expensive for the likes of me, I could buy a bottle of whisky for what I spent on these sweets but then again it wouldn’t be a very good bottle of whisky and these were very good sweet treats.
If you’re interested in seeing what all the fuss is about then head over to and treat yourself.

I paid for my sweets and thanks to my daughter for helping me polish them off.

The Captain.

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